Posts tagged Friends

It was just over the weekend I had dinner with Steph. Well, the usual catch up session and all. We then touched on the topic of relationship. She sparked the question, “So, any prospect yet with any girls?”.

Haha, seriously, I think a lot of people are more worried of me being single than I actually am myself. But, great! Thanks for the concern people. But, bearing in mind that if I am meant to be single, then it is God’s will, not mine. Then again, men and women are meant to be united as one in God’s Kingdom. Hence, I am sure there is one person out there whom he has kept waiting for me while I build his Kingdom. (Okay, I am sounding like I am preaching the whole lot of the Church but hey, that’s my life man. Either you like me bad, or you like me good.)

Okay, what I am going to touch about here is “Support System” in a relationship, be it your family, friends, date or your spouse. Often in relationship, the key issue faced is “time” spent together. I think this is actually the main major issue most relationship fail.

Let me take for example of relationship as a couple. Steph and I talked about our friends who finds that relationship is all about spending time together as a couple. To me, probably that is not entirely true. I believe and I think that being in a relationship is all about support. Often that we hear that one side of a couple says that their partner doesn’t spend much time together with him/her. They go on and complaint that all their partner do is work and work and only spend 1 time a week with him/her. I could say that mostly, again, “mostly” the women will complaint about that the most.

What is support in a relationship?

To put it simply, personally, I feel that when the man goes to work, what most the woman can do is support. Often at many times, woman thinks that their man should be giving more time to her instead of his work. There are many more but I shall not go further. My opinion is much one-sided but I suppose men has the tendency to do such complaints too. Now, the earlier comment is very subjective, because certain group of woman would think that when their man only knows about work, there could be a hidden agenda or something.

Now, I wouldn’t say this is not true but… hey, all man are evil to you ladies who has been cheated by their man, no?

While another group would think that they are second in priority in her man’s life and heart.

Personally, if I was that man (I’m such a classic good example no?), I would say “Give me all the support that you can as much as I give all the love I can give to you.” When I put an importance to my work now, I am putting an importance towards you as well as to our future “if” we ever build a family together.

As I put it in my own words, “I am building my empire here”, a future for myself or the both of us. If all you can do is complaint of the lack of time spent together while not trusting me doing my bit for the relationship of ours, then it will never end. Of course, time spent will be limited but the trust, love and support should and must be greater than that!

Because, the glory will come for the family when the man has more than enough to provide for the family and it will also be the time the man will have more time to spend with his loved ones. Unless the man of the family don’t have proper planning or succession plans in his work/business, it will not help much. Let’s talk reality here, living expenses is just going up by the day and if the man can’t provide for himself enough, what makes you think there will be a family which can survive by just enough?

Plus, when it comes to support it is also a mutual role in providing for the family. Hence, women plays equal part. In this world, man are never higher than woman, just the role is different in the life of a man or woman.

I would say that, be it if you are a woman or a man. In a relationship, support them all you can with any means and in any stage of your life. If your spouse works late night, ask them if they need food. If your spouse is having trouble at work, be a good listener. If your spouse can’t cook well so do you, eat out together. If your spouse is having income issues this month, spend less and budget for the month. In any situation, there is a way out. In the end, the essence of relationship is being together happy with love in the eyes of God (if you are a religious person). Plus, you don’t need to be a religious person to know what’s love.