I let you all know one big secret okay?

Don’t leak it out to others okay?

You promise?

If you promise, I promise I will bring you out for a good dinner.

I’m sure now I can buy you nice nice super extravagant dinner at JW Marriott sure you eat till you cry wan…

Because now I am RICH!

(eeyeerrr look at my signature! I need my Photoshop back!!!)

Not very often I will entertain this kinda stupid spams… but I just couldn’t resist it lah.. I’m having a break from work and already no mood to spend my day concentrating on work…

How I wish I can be an instant millionaire. Dream on YapThomas!!!

Oh wells…

Weekend kam fast fast puuhhllleaaassseeee…..

I want to leave.

As soon as I can.

I can’t take it anymore.

Just…

…drop everything and leave!!!

Leave to some place where people can’t trace me anymore.

To some place where I can be myself and with myself all alone.

Or, maybe someone can come along.

So that I won’t be bored till death while I’m there.

Hopefully, that someone will be a woman.

Because it will be the only two of us there, and there is no entertainment.

What man and woman will do when there is nothing else to do?

Then, we can create our small “kampung” and then a small town and then a city.

Then maybe, we could be a nation already in 50 years to come! -_-

*smacks self*

“Back to work YapThomas”

Sorry… got carried away… *toddles*

Weeks ago…

Then, recently… I dumped him…

Because… I merajuk…

and you know what???

It works… Works like MAGIC…

Today, I received an SMS

Hey bro, I think I’m following you guys to Aussie. How much has it increased already ah

WOOHOOO!!! Brilliant!!

I don’t need magician like David to teach me this trick! hahahaha

Looks like the crowd is getting larger… Woohooo!!

P/S: NO! I don’t do this to the ladies… I treat every lady with utmost respect and sincerity. A love to gain is a love to give, first. Never the other way round...

It was during Educare Dinner few weeks ago..

I decided to play around with Nigesh’s props. Nigesh is from Come Back Kings.

What? You don’t know who Come Back Kings are!!?? Come on!! You should and must know about them! Because, you need some funny moments, you find Come Back Kings!!

Enough of the plug now.. haha

So… I decided to play around with Nigesh’s props and here are the pictures..

It was so random, as I check out his stash of props he brought…

Okay.. don’t fall off the chair now!!.. hahaha

Happy Holiday peeps!! hahaha

Random or Stupidity? You tell me… -_-

Then, suddenly you all think that is not right, right…

Then, she fires back at me and you all jump to support her, right…

But after all your comments I don’t give a shit, right…

Then bloggers started criticizing the right of me as a blogger to bitch blog about her, right…

I get loads of comments of ‘childish’ ‘idiot’ ‘dumb’ blab la bla, right me no care…

Some comments are just funny… and they are friends to begin with..

Aggie decides to give me a bottle of whiskey -__- which helps very much!

Woaa.. what’s happening down here man?
Make love not war okay..
*hands thomas a bottle of whiskey*

The one whom I shall praise is Mooks. He wrote me this…

Hey dude, your blog is bad english personified. It gives me the chills just reading it. Please improve on your language before even considering posting another vomit inducing post. You malaysians got to learn how to speak and write.

Hahaha… Nothing else to bash but to bash my bad England? Powderful lah you!
Oh… seems like Mooks is from Australia as the IP says so.

LET ME TELL U WHAT IS RIGHT!

I was right from the beginning that most bloggers are just plain KAY PO!
They like to jump and see what’s going on and hehehe join the party!!
That’s so blogger! -__- Ok lah… I’m one of them also…
Just like this blogger who decides to join the bandwagon…

I was really expecting flaming comments like THIS which scares the shit outta me!

“OMFG your like sooooooo NOT MATURE.”

WADDDEEEE HEEEELLLLLLLL <<<<<
and and all those pics she took,she’s just takin some pics,you want her to act ugly izit? No rights to put her pics in blogger without her permission and its like ur obsess wif her. Ur so f*cukin scary and lame and childish so just go f**k yourself :]]]]]]
by some fella

Oh, I got her permission anyways…

I was right from the beginning that bloggers like CONTROVERSY!

David like it as much as *grabs popcorn and starts munching*

Sometimes, we need to just read the post all over again just to confirm what we read. Proof Read People! Proof Read! I always do that.
Even I put a
PS: Readers should be more careful in the ‘whole’ content rather than the title itself…
It doesn’t work.

*hint* okaylah, maybe that’s a lil too hidden… -___-

Then there are people who read your post in Innit and don’t ‘Nang’ your Innit.
Very Annoying and Sad! I know! Maybe mustardqueen can tell you how she feels…

This was the single most annoying thing for both of us to shout about! Hahaha
Why you all har, read Innit post don’t want to ‘Nang’ wan!
WHY? WHY? WHY? WHY?
Very sad wan you know… *sobs* Must always leave your footprints mah…
Oi Tim: Do something about ‘right click + open in new tab’

Oh, and and and, there are times when you post on Innit, bloggers will not be there to read or ‘Nang’. So the best times to post at Innit would be around
Morning: 8am-10am, where people who goes to work and start checking Innit.
Afternoon: 12pm-2pm, where people just ‘ta pao’ and eat in front of the PC
Evening: 5pm-6pm, where people whom are working finished work and check Innit
Night: about 10pm onwards, where most people starts to come online and the whole Internet world are alive in this region.

So yeah… ermmm…. hehe

Okay lah… some of you were right lah… it was a planned DRAMA… wtf!

We underestimated the true colours of bloggers out there -__-

When readers/bloggers bash… they go all out! Giving their Level 10 ‘Hou Dou Ken‘
*waves at Narymama’s friends *

I shall thus say that, this little experiment was an explosion rather fun just to find out what would bloggers read and ‘Nang’ in Innit.

Officially now YapThomas is the stupidest person in the whole blogsphere for pulling this kinda stint! -___- This is so not gonna happen anymore hahaha

I shall hide and go play far far from now on… haha

Anyways, Narymama’s blog is one blog to look out for lah… Funny and crazy and yet very the ‘tau kei’… (tau kei = small kid)

OK TQ BYE

Special Drama credits goes to… :
Nadia aka Narymama, for going crazy for this… okay your Innit title gets more hits.
Innit, for being as good as you can be! -__- wtf
Nuffnang, for creating Innit…
Suzette, for your 91 ‘Nangs’ give us inspiration to pull this stint..
YOU ALL BLOGGERS OUT THERE!!, for mostly buying it… hahaha *hides*

*oh… don’t worry… no hidden words* *puts on harsh words-proof vest*

*shall revert back to the good boy blogging now*

It is a special drink I used to order back in those days…

Mixture of

Horlicks

Milo

Kopi

and

Teh

I ought to get whacked by the ‘ah neh’ everytime i order this drink…

The conversation would be

Me: “Ah Neh! Lick Mi Ko Teh satu!”… (Brother, One Lick Mi Ko Teh)
Ah Neh: “Apa! You Cakap Apa!???” (What you just said!!??)
Me: “Relax lah ah neh.. I order Horlick campur Milo campur Kopi campur Teh”
Ah Neh: *gives one weird look* “Tak Da” (don’t have)
Me: “Kenapa Tak Da? You tak de Kopi ke Milo?”
(Why not? You don’t have coffee or milo?)
Ah Neh: “Teh Oh Ais Limau ada? Mau? (I have Ice Lemon Tea. Want?)

Now, the word Lick Mi Ko Teh when pronounced and heard in our Malaysian
‘rojak’ language, it sound like I’m saying “Lick My Testicles”. wtf… -___-

Ko Teh practically sounds like Kotek and Kotek in Malay ’slang’ means Testicles.

I wonder if the brand Kotex was inspired by this word… -__- wtf

OK BYE!

*So, I blasted at this blogger in my blog, I sort of humiliated her and got some people
very pissed at me because blah blah blah and blah…!
I shall not explain further till i sort things out… no explanation at the moment…*

OK BYE AGAIN

Did you all know that our ex Selangor Menteri Besar now got a blog?

Cetusan Dr. Mohamad Khir Toyo.

So, after a big defeat from his MB-ship and now our beloved KT wants to get in touch
with bloggers eh? What a nice move and I really hope to read what he has to write lah.

Don’t really know if it is HIM started the blog or some of his ‘kaki’ but well, I find that
he needs some tips and pointers on blogging lah… from a blogger point of view.

So, I left him a comment but it was a moderated comment… So wait till it pop up lah.

In the meantime, let me reproduce the same comment I left there,

Dr Mohamad Khir Toyo,

Baik sungguh YB nak mulakan blog! Saya amat gembira and ingin membantu YB rasa seperti di rumah di ruang ‘blogger’ ini.

Pertama sekali, YB perlu belajar untuk ‘camwhore’. Lagi-lagi YB mesti ada banyak ‘function’. Kami nak tengok apakah ‘lifestyle’ sebagai seorang ahli politik. Kita semua ‘blogger’ memang pro nak ‘camwhore’. Tapi janganlah guna taktik ‘act cute’ sebab biasanye ‘blogger’ perempuan saja yang banyak guna taktik itu.

YB, mungkin anda akan minat dengan online advertising yang manyak ‘famous’ itu www.nuffnang.com
Lagi-lagi trafik YB mesti banyak dan YB bolehlah dapat ‘extra’ income kan baik?

YB terima tak ‘tagging’? Maksudnye, kena buat petikan yang sama jenisnye kalau YB kena ‘tag’.

YB ada install ‘Google Analytics’? Senang nak ‘track’ pembaca YB.

Rasanye YB tak akan letak ‘chatbox’ kan? Susah nanti sebab mesti ada banyak drama punya.

Oh akhir sekali, bila pulak YB nak letak ‘link’? Can we exchange links?

Setakat sajalah ‘tips’ dan saya menunggu petikan YB yang seterusnya, tapi janganlah ambil masa yang lama ye…

Quick, you might wanna leave a comment at Dr. Khir Toyo’s blog!

You see, in Malaysia we are so multi-cultural that for us guys, we can date different
types of girls. For those playboys out there, please shush!! Let me state my say!

But we can get more from the world than in Malaysia! Let me do some analytics.

My take will be categorized in First, Second and Third Date.

Let’s start it off with

The Chinese “Mei Mei”

First date
You get to buy her an expensive dinner but nothing happens.

Second date
You buy her an even more expensive dinner. Again, Nothing Happens!

Third date
You usually don’t get up to third date because you are smart enough to realize that
nothing is ever going to happen.

Yeah.. wells.. ermm.. *sigh*

Then next, the

The Indian “Minachi”

First date
Meet her parents.

Second date
Set the date of the wedding.

Third date
Wedding night.

Wah.. I’m not Lakshmi Mittal the Billionaire weh.. cannot! Cannot!..

Next in line would be

The Malay “Minah”

First date
You get to kiss her goodnight.

Second date
You get to grope all over and make out a bit.

Third Date
She moves in.
One week later, her father, , her 4 mother, her 18 sisters, her 20 brothers, all of
their kids, her 16 grandmas, her father’s girlfriend’s mother, her 268 cousins all
move in. ~~~ But don’t worry you can repeat this 4 times.

Wah.. “jialat” like that too much to handle liao..

We already have Asians, now

White “Mary”

First Date
You both get drunk and have sex.

Second Date
You both get drunk and have sex.

20th Anniversary
You both get drunk and have sex.

*phew* I want to date white girls!! -_-

Let’s see about Arabs?

Arab “Al-Katijah”

First Date
Mother, Father, Brothers, Sisters, Cousins, Aunts, Uncles, Friends and entire arab community finds out.

Second Date
You are shot dead.

Third date
Not Applicable.

No way I’m gonna date arab girls. I don’t want to die

Let’s see what about the African

African “Mochamama”

First Date
Your pluto-years parents will “keel” you for dating an African women.

Second Date
Her parents will adore you like god.

Third Date
You have to run naked half-naked around the village for life

Haiya.. even more “jia-lat” like that..kenot! kenot!

Oh well, is there any mix of Chinese, Malay, Indian, White, Arab and African
girls out there?

This post is inspired by an e-mail. The last part added by me.

YapThomas.Com << empat bulan! >>
eyeyamfarkedbesarmasa

Angie msn-ed me and the conversation as follow: (bold is me)

n-g yapthomas empat bulan?
n-g yapthomas u mengandung ke
yapthomas n-g no
yapthomas n-g its her
n-g yapthomas :-O
n-g yapthomas u becoming father oredi?
yapthomas n-g yeah very soon
yapthomas n-g 5 more months..
n-g yapthomas kiong hee kiong hee
n-g yapthomas must tell me when she delivers
yapthomas n-g thank you thank you!
n-g yapthomas eh thomas
n-g yapthomas so apa nama u nak kasih anak
yapthomas n-g tommy
yapthomas n-g kalau laki la.. kalau pompuan = tammy
yapthomas n-g maybe timmy = laki and tammy = pompuan
yapthomas n-g so if i got both girl and boy.. i call them tim tam
n-g yapthomas ….
n-g yapthomas …………………………………………………………
n-g yapthomas …………………………………………………………………………………………….
yapthomas n-g a simple -_- will do please
n-g yapthomas neva c u put in ur blog oso one…
yapthomas n-g this one so special till i can’t put in my blog
n-g yapthomas hmmm..
n-g yapthomas u are just taking me for a ride
yapthomas n-g ahahha
yapthomas n-g
yapthomas n-g u really think there is a “her” that got mengandung ..!!
yapthomas n-g ???!!???
n-g yapthomas empat bulan and .. ‘i am farked big time’ …
n-g yapthomas that’s the thing i can think off ma
n-g yapthomas u know those 2 taglines dun go hand in hand
n-g yapthomas but i like ur sense of humour
n-g yapthomas bagus.. tim tam
n-g yapthomas tammy.. singapore
n-g yapthomas u gonna haf tammy malaysia

Actual fact.. 4 months is something else.. sigh…
Which I am still trying so hard to clear this dispute…

I’m lazy to blog la… but here it is…

RULES:
1. The tag victim has to come up with 8 different points about his/her perfect lover.
2. Have to mention the gender of his/her perfect lover.
3. Tag eight other victims to join this game and leave a comment on their blog.
4. If you are tagged the second time, there is NO need to do this again.
5. Lastly, and most importantly, HAVE FUN DOING IT.

Point Number 1 = Sexy, Super Hot, Drop-Dead Gorgeous (X “act-cute” TYPE)
Come on! It’s a guy’s dream mah.. right?? But somehow, I do believe in “beauty
and the beast”. Like how you see guys so NOT-lengchai *like me* can get so HOT chic!

Point Number 2 = Rich! Loaded Unlimited…
Yes, I’m just too poor to pay for the steak or the Malibu drink… *nyek x 2*

Ohkay, if she doesn’t possess either or both of No 1 and No 2, these will do…

Point Number 3 = Good Cook
Someone who can satisfy my stomach! hahaha..

Point Number 4 = Independent
Someone who knows how to take care of herself, think and act independently.
Someone who don’t rely too much on her partner. *making my life easy lah!!*
I really appreciate if she really knows how to run and plan everything…
It’s just something that would attract me…

Point Number 5 = Knows the word FUN
Because I am a SUPER BORING person. I need someone to cheer me up with all
the FUNs.. Fun like a crazy weekend activity catching dogs around a park?
or.. some new ideas for “nighttime activities”?

Point Number 6 = Be HERSELF
Just be herself.. no need to follow suggestions of “any-body-implant” or
“500kg of make-up make u face look noticeable or sexier”!

Point Number 7 = Neat & Tidy
Some *cough* ladies *cough* could be very messy..
I don’t know how to elaborate this point but then again.. yeah.. Neat & Tidy..

Point Number 8 = Trust!
I do find trust is essential in a relationship.. It’s the spice that keeps relationship
last long..

That’s it. Thank you very much! “I pretty much enjoy witting this up”

I SHALL NOW TAG = WHOEVER WHO WANTS TO DO IT…